Re-Re-Re-Revival!!!!

We did it. The first youth Sunday at Southside Baptist... it happened. Not because of us FOR SURE... but because of God talking to some high school girls and them listening.  You can read the story here. 

Practicing before

I really don't know what to say... I know that crazy because I never shut up... but the day was so good and SO GOD! There were youth singing and playing instruments with Jacob and Hunter (the bromance). It was so awesome. The fact that those students were up on stage in front of the congregation and their peers was a total God thing (especially for the pretty girl by Jacob... love her). We had the band and the youth choir. The choir kept growing and growing and kids kept coming and wanting to join in the awesomeness. That's how Christianity should be.  People shouldn't be appalled or disgusted with our hypocrisy or whatever turns them off... they should be attracted by and want to join in with the BOLD... the COURAGEOUS... the JOYFUL!!! 

Basically... these students led the adults in worship. No one left. No one got upset (that I know of) about the crazed demon boxes or electricity gi-tar. God was DEFINITELY glorified. He delighted in us and we were delighting in Him for sure.  Some of the kids were so nervous... wanting to throw up... before it started! That's how big of a deal this was. I felt like a proud momma! :) And a person led in worship by youth, that we just love, like never before.  Ahh... my heart is just singing and a'screamin'!!! 


After the music part of worship... one of our dear friends shared his testimony as the message. Barrett Foster... a miracle... shared his story.  Sadly... I have never written a full post about him... because in my frazzled head... I think if I don't write or talk or think about the bad/scary/tragic then it didn't really happen.  I wrote a little here, but it doesn't scratch the surface of what has happened in the past year. 
His story doesn't start here, but a huge part of what has molded him, Michelle, and their kids started Jan. 25, 2011. Barrett's truck met a tree. I don't know the specifics, but the collision basically broke every bone in the left side of his body.  His lungs collapsed. His skull was fractured. He was resuscitated multiple times. He was treated by every kind of doctor imaginable... and they admitted that only God can help. Barrett was in the hospital for 6 months straight and is constantly going back for therapy and visits. Barrett shouldn't be here. But he was and he is. His kids became our kids. We became a part of the Foster family and their story has become a major part of ours. Barrett wasn't suppose to live. He did. Barrett wasn't suppose to use his arms. He uses both of them. Barrett was suppose to stay in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. Barrett walks... 

He's a miracle and God is amazing. Barrett's story is definitely not a story of medical genius or a miraculous surgical procedure... his story is God's story. I'm so thankful I am able to be a part of this story. God turned beauty into ashes... and is still doing so.

You can see Barrett's wheelchair that was used for his
testimony... not his transportation.

Since my brain likes to live in Utopia... I never went in Barrett's hospital room. I stayed in the waiting room... praying, loving on my new family, and only holding on to the positive HOPE.  I don't regret doing that because I KNEW Barrett would be HEALED. I never doubted. I never saw anything to prove anything else. I just believed in God's voice. I have seen God work in so many ways through this one family's story. That Tuesday night in January or last year was so grim and dark standing in the hospital waiting to hear SOMETHING.  But... seeing Barrett STANDING on stage... this past year has been nothing less than miraculous... challenging - HECK YES!, painful - so many tears for all involved, iffy - YEP!, confusing - lots of questions... but miraculous - MORE THAN ANYTHING. 


I know I said I didn't have anything to say... I lied. 


I am thankful for yesterday. God is faithful. I am claiming REVIVAL... I am believing. 


Here's my hubby... our bold leader. My favorite thing in marriage is seeing Jacob being used by Jesus... it happens often so life is good.

a weekend in the life of a youth pastor's wife...

Finally... the boys beat us in numbers!! Go fellas! 

This is the group we took skiing last weekend!!! IT WAS A BLAST!! Seriously... so fun! 

We stayed in Andrews, NC at a camp called Snowbirds. I have NO idea what to expect, but it FAR out did what I could have been expecting!!! It was GREAT!!! The staff loved on us lots, the food was pretty good, they PREACHED the Word... not watered-down happy-go-lucky campy stuff, and we enjoyed time together laughing. Let me just show you some stuff that went down.

First... Maggie pulled these AWESOME hats our of her suitcase and I HAD to have one!! If you don't think these are great... you need to... umm... eat a rotten banana.

They had this awesome 2-man swing that was open for us the first night!!! It was so fun! 

While waiting in line... I got told my various people that their guess for my age was anywhere from 14-17... WOW! The youth think this is hilarious... because people are SHOCKED when I tell them I am married and not 14-17. Everytime I rode with a stranger on the ski life (which I LOVE to do), they asked me what grade I was in... REALLY people? REALLY? Maybe it will be worth it when I'm 40 and I look like I'm... umm... we will go with 25! :)

We have some cool yutes!! So fun! :) 

Here's my hubs.  He's pretty cute and a great youth pastor.  

He's also a pretty dang good skiier!! He can ski backwards, navigate down the double black diamonds, and not die!! Not dying is key!! 

All of us looking cool with our gear! :) Had a great time. I made it my point to get on the ski lift with every girl to talk... I accomplished it for the most part.  :) I like to get them in a place they can't escape conversation! I love getting to know them and their crazy lives!! Aren't they adorable? 

This is Jacob's bromance.. Hunter. Just kidding... kinda.  Hunter showed up in our lives last semester and leads worship for the youth and college services.  He's a great guy and I love his girlfriend Stephanie!! So glad they got thrown into our lives and are just embracing our awkward, passionate, chaotic lives!!! :) 

Learning a lot about this word right now. What does OBEDIENCE really look like? What does a passionate, focused, Christ follower look like in Troy, AL? O... how I want to know. I hope I am seeking and He continues revealing to me along the way how I can just OBEY. 

One thing that I fell in love with at camp was their PRAYER CHAPEL!!! I believe in the power of prayer and God has shown me His presence in a prayer chapel... see here. This prayer chapel was just... captivating. There were different centers for different prayer-filled activities and things to pray for. I could have stayed there all day. I loved the paintings, writings, and pictures hanging on the walls, but I adored the things pictured below.  

Jesus PAID our debt. We have VICTORY!!! Oh... HOORAY!!!! 

We are now called to MAKE WAR on our sin... not settle with "struggling" with our sin.  MAKE WAR and fight for HOLINESS!!!! You already have the victory and the POWER that raised Jesus from the dead. YOU CAN'T LOSE! 

Don't settle for money, fame, or comfort. Living in God's will is the only thing that will satisfy our desperate hearts. 

I'm thankful for fun, crazy, laugh-til-you-pee-in-your-pants ski trips... but all the trips, Wednesday nights, Bible studies, and effort is only to glorify Him. :) I hope he enjoyed watching His kids acting like fools on the ski slopes, making new relationships, and all that goodness!!! 

YAY Ski trip!! Can't wait until next year!! 

HOUSE OF JOY!

This is my new door hanger! I love it! 

When we moved into our home, one of our friends wanted us to order a door hanging (they are made by one of the ladies in out church... amazing) and that would be our gift from her.  Well... I took this very seriously because I wanted it to me perfect.  I love the cutsie holiday decorations, but I didn't want it for our home. I wanted this hanger to be something that spoke TRUTH over our home.  I thought about getting a WORD... because I LOVE words.  So I thought and thought about the perfect WORD for our home. The word that was spoken over and over again to me was JOY!  

That was to be the word for our home... a house of JOY! God has called me and our family to be a JOY-GIVER... and our house should be filled with it!!! :) 

That doesn't always mean we will be happy... but it means that we will always point to the SOURCE of joy! It's a great thing we aren't responsible for creating JOY... we just rest in His! 

In our marriage... we have had some difficult conversations (as I'm sure is true with all marriages). The conversations, confessions, and things that have brought the most hurt and tears have also brought the most JOY... because God is faithful. JOY comes in prayerfulness. He gives VICTORY! 

After one of those conversations with Jacob, God showed me Psalm 20! I fell in love!  It's all about David crying out to the Lord for VICTORY... JOYFUL VICTORY! That is my hearts cry too. Here's what I want written on our home (not literally... i know that sounds like something I would do but... no, that's a bit tacky)

⁴ May he grant your heart’s desires       

and make all your plans succeed.  

⁵ May we shout for joy when we hear of your victory       

and raise a victory banner in the name of our Lord.

 May the LORD answer all your prayers. 

Psalm 20:4-5

I want the words JOY and VICTORY constantly raised over our house!!! We will continue to wave our banners and fight for both in this house of JOY! We are believing. We are fighting. We are rejoicing. We are dancing. We are singing. We are lifting Him high! 

running the race...

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!! 

Hope your day is grand. My Valentine got me some flowers and a card... even though he promised he wouldn't. They are lovely. I love them and him...

One another note...

This weekend we also went to my bro-in-law's ordination service that was held Sunday night.  This is a big deal and we are extremely proud of him! To be ordained means to be set apart, called, chosen... and I promise that Jared and Ashley are both ordained to serve Christ is crazy ways.  The ordination is just the approval of a council of men and the church on what God has already done, given, and said.  We are so honored to be a part of their journey, to see the awesome ways that God is using them now, and are prayerful about the next phases in their ministry together.  They leave in July for full-time foreign missions. PRAY. 

Sunday morning, Jared ran a marathon in downtown Birmingham... a MARATHON people!! he's nuts! That's 26.2 miles!!! That's disgusting! My body wants to literally crumble thinking about running for 4 hours straight!!! AHH!! But... Jared did it! He ran! He finished! He completed a dern marathon!! He ran a marathon and got ordained all in the same day... pretty awesome.  Jared told his testimony and then people spoke into his life and ministry.  The pastor of his church spoke at the ordination service - he said a lot of really good things like:

• just because you are in the ministry, doesn't mean you are automatically filled, you have to continually be in the Word, being FILLED and satisfied with Him.
• Like in a marathon, you have to have endurance.  You will get frustrated and discouraged in ministry. You will want to give up. DON'T! Press on! Remember His faithfulness, goodness, and love so far... and press on. keep running. Jared hit a break wall in his marathon at about mile 20... he wanted to quit... but he didn't.  He pressed on.  His pastor encouraged him to do the same in ministry. If he can physically push his body to keep running, he can press on towards the forever victory! I thought that was such a powerful picture! :) 
• To live with integrity. To live an honest, open, transparent, truth-filled life. Set boundaries. Guard your heart. Set safeguards in your life where you need them - on the internet, TV, music, what you read, etc. Guard your heart and your family. 

This picture is so powerful to me.  After the pastor spoke and other people shared time in the service, there was a time for "laying on of hands." This isn't some creepy thing... just time for other ordained men to speak and pray truth over you.  Jared is kneeling in the picture and the man praying over him is Ernie... our youth pastor. Ernie... God has used him in so many ways. I have typed and erased about 15 times trying to figure out how to explain him.  He's the reason that me, Jacob, Jared, and so many of our friends are who we are today. He poured his life into ours. He prayed for us daily (I have no doubt). He taught us truth. He laughed with us. He loved Jesus first and we saw it and wanted it.

All of the fam (me, Jacob, and the parentals) were a little teary during this moment. It's just so awesome that Ernie had the opportunity to see the fruit of his work and the faithfulness of God. And so awesome for Jared to have the man who led him the Christ praying over him as he is sent out to the mission field. 

I started thinking about our youth and the amazing ways that God is using my husband. I love to see Jacob pouring into, praying for, and loving the students! I don't know what God has in store for the students' lives, but we are so honored to be a part of it. Maybe one day we can be a part of something like this for the kids that we are constantly investing in! Sending them off to speak about the amazing love and truth of Jesus!!! Who knows what God has planned! He's crazy!! 


And... I just love this video and think you should watch it because it's great! 

being busy is NOT always good

Merry Monday!!! Hope your weekend was superb!! Mine was pretty fantastic! I'll tell you about it now....


Jacob and I went on a marriage retreat. It's called "A Weekend to Remember". It was FABULOUS!! We were a little apprehensive at first because when I think marriage retreat I think about a lot of old people, being mushy gushy and lots of talk about LOVE.  Well... this retreat was really about MARRIAGE... and all the stuff that comes with it!!! If you are married... GO to the conference!! if you think you don't need it... you DEFINITELY need to go!!! Here we are being all lovey... going to our retreat:

I'll explain what we learned in a bit... just hold your horses! I know you are PUMPED! 

Saturday night is DATE NIGHT at the retreat (wink wink nudge nudge).  So... We decided to go bowling and then out to eat!! We love bowling! Fun fact: When we were in high school, Jacob and I were in a bowling league!! haha! Jacob had his own bag, ball, shoes, and gloves.  Guess what? I beat him every time!! haha! He does this fancy, fast, rounding throw of the ball.  I kind of stumble up to the lane and throw it straight.  I remind myself of Fred Flinestone! But... I always beat him.  My highest score, NO LIE, was a 215. (For those of you who don't know... the highest possible is 300!). Anyways... bowling is near and dear to our hearts! Here is my hubs bowling:

Please note how romantic it is... there are 500 children. Both sides of us were using bumpers and the metal ball roller things. One kid cheered and high-fived us after every turn.  Quite the romantic get-a-way!!! :)

And yes... I beat him!!!! 

After the epic bowling experience we headed to Outback (we had a gift card... woo hoo!). We talked about our take-aways from the weekend and what we wanted to see our marriage become. And we ate the most amazing thing ever (I did NOT count calories on Saturday!). This masterpiece you see below is warm chocolate waffles, chocolate syrup, oreos, whip cream, and ice cream! WHAT!?!?!?!? It was SO tasty! 

Makes your mouth water doesn't it? Oh yeah! 

So... marriage. It's not like the movies (can I get an amen? ha) In MANY ways it's SO much better (when it's founded on Christ), and in other ways it takes a lot more work than Hollywood lets on. I learned a lot this weekend... about me. Many times I like to sugar coat myself and think that it's OTHER people that need to CHANGE (scary word)... and not ME.  But... let me tell you.. it's me! :) 

I am learning that busy-ness is not always good. I have to and WANT to invest intentional time into my marriage. I so often (as I always have) fill up every minute of every day with activity and events and people... and don't have US time with my hubby. Our marriage is more important than ANY other earthly relationship. I know that and love that... but it's hard to apply it to everyday life when you love Bible study girls, work peeps, family, and friends!! My husband has to come first!!! If you are married... spend intentional, unhindered, unhurried, undistracted time with your husband.  That is so important. And it influences EVERY area of your lives together - happiness, sex, work, EVERYTHING! 

Transparency in talking is SO key.  Our conversation has always been deep - we love talking about Christ, the church, issues in life, blah blah... but total transparency is tough for me.  As I have said before, I have a lot of walls... and to tell someone all of my faults, shame, struggles, and thoughts (even when I know it is so good and necessary)... it's tough. I close up. I hide. I cover it up. I sugar coat. I was open this weekend with my husband... and I am free of a lot of stuff. I haven't done anything crazy so don't get that in your head. There's just some baggage and bondage that I have that I needed to be freed from. I confessed and exposed. I am letting Jesus work in them and letting my hubby encourage me through them. BREAK DOWN WALLS in your own life!! It's tough and painful at times... it calls for some vulnerability... it may cause some tears... but... oh... it's so good to have Jesus and your husband embrace you with love and understanding and victory. 

One thing that was talked about was that our marriage is a picture of Christ and the Church. DUH! Marriage 101.  But... our marriage is to REFLECT the image and character of God!!!! Wow! I haven't thought about it like that! Does our marriage, in its entirety, reflect the character of God? In some areas, it doesn't. I want it to! We want it to! We want our marriage to fully reflect the glory, love, hope, truth, intimacy, endurance, prayerfulness, peace, ... of God!!! 

One more thing - I have been learning about submission. I don't like that word. I like the words TRUST WHOLLY better. Meaning.. I need to trust Jacob whole heartedly because I know he's following hard after Jesus. If he tells me that he feels that we need to pick up and move to Brazil tomorrow... I need to be okay with that and trust him and his leadership in our family.  Most of the time... I like to be in control! That's not what my role is. If I ask for advice or he feels God is teaching him something about us... my role is to listen and apply.  When I see that... and I see my obedience to that... I see the reflection of Christ and the Church. 

We learned a lot more that you don't need to know unless you are in our marriage... and you aren't... because that would be awkward. And no... we didn't need a marriage retreat or someone telling us about marriage to figure things out. But it was so great to have time to just focus on US, on our marriage, and what Christ has called us to be. 

Marriage is good. I love living life with my best friend, leader, encourager, truth-speaker, and more. I love running after Christ together.

Go enjoy being married if you are married. If you are single, take it from Paul... stay single. :) 

Whew... that was a lot of vomit. 

just another fabulous friday in february

Hello there.  - I don't know why, but I always feel like I need to greet the world before I start vomiting away. So... hello. 


This week has been good. I felt felt very overwhelmed and satisfied (at the same time) by Jesus this week. I have not been afraid of things I have feared even last week. He has assured me. He is just really good. 


Jacob and I are going on a marriage retreat this weekend. I'm pumped... I think Jacob is too. It's not anywhere special... just Montgomery. But I am so looking forward to us time... JANNA time. Janna (Jacob+Anna=Janna) is what our high school friends called us even when we weren't dating (we swore we didn't like each other for like 4 years... but obviously... something was a brewin'). I don't know what marriage retreats look like so it should be entertaining, enlightening, and enjoyable! :) I feel like a baptist preacher when I do that with words.  "The 3 E's of a marriage conference".  Ha! Anywho... I will let you know how that goes... all the awkward moments, the great moments... don't worry I will leave out the Victoria Secret rated moments.  ha! 


Sunday, we are heading up to the Ham to be apart of Jared's ordination service. I am excited about that and so honored to be there for it. I've told this keyboard before (because I don't know who I am actually telling) that Jared has been a brother to me since I was in the 7th grade. I have seen God grab hold of him and never let go. He has impacted mine and Jacob's lives in so many ways!! Excited to share this day with him, Ashley, and JoJo. By the way... here's a pic of me a JoJo... ain't she presh? 

Another thing I am excited about is a video I am making for Bible Study!!! it's FABULOUS!!! It's Valentine's ya know... love is in the air... so we need to have the annual sex talk in Bible study.  I decided to recruit some help this year! From whom you might ask... well, I chose these love experts:

Please note the puffiness of my checks... I had just had my wisdom teeth taken out, had to be driven to school by my mom, thrown up lots, and was determined to dance the night away at BARN PARTY with the BESTIES! :) All worth it.

We are all in different stages in our life and it's just beautimous!!! We have the old married one (even though she's younger than me), ENGAGED one, single one, married one (me), and dating one!!! :) I asked them about making a video of their thoughts, what Jesus was teaching them, and what the importance of purity is to each of them! They were pumped to make the videos, and can I tell ya... they are hilarious! :) I can't wait to show them to the girls on Monday! I am editing them, putting them to music, and adding some sass to it!! I love it! :) I am so thankful for friends that are willing to make crazy videos, talking about Jesus and encouraging girls they barely know! That's true friendship... it really is. I hope you all have a Lindsey Jo (to make you laugh and keep you grounded), a Ami (to pray for you, laugh with, and show you true strength), a Beck (to keep you thinking, determined, and in line), and a Em (for all the in betweens and so much more). It's just good... God knew what I needed when I moved to the UT! 

Something interesting you may not know about me... I LOVE ZUMBA! :) It's so stinking fun. We have a fabulous ZUMBA teacher here in Troy! :) great right? But I just love going, making new friends, looking crazy, and dancing the night away.  Zumba can make a girl feel pretty sexy (minus all the sweat and body odor). I think all women should feel sexy and worth it! It's important. When you feel good about yourself, you feel good about your husband, friends, plans, life, and everything else. So... you should all go to Zumba! If you are ever in Troy... let me know and we will definitely go because Zumba-Master Sherri can make ya feel like a million bucks and ready for the Victoria Secret Fashion Show - okay, maybe not that sexy but... o well. 

I am excited about life right now. I see God moving in VERY tangible ways. I see my prayers being answered... clearly. I see things happening and changing. I see Him making a way. I don't want to miss out. I want to be right in the middle of His movement. I want to hear all about it. I want to be obedient. I want to fight for joy and fight for freedom for myself and for my friends. 

leading learners...

My heart is full today. It is just full.

Learners... willing to lead.

This weekend was spectacular (spend the nights, lunch date with Katy and Hamzah, a middle school pageant, and a super bowl). Friday, we have a spend the night party with some of my favorite girls EVER - the high schoolers! I was just coming as a participant... a snack bringer... and had a few games in the car like APPLES TO APPLES and MAD GAB!! YES! :) I told the 11th graders, if they wanted some Jesus time during the night... it was theirs to plan.  

A seeker... finding TRUTH and fighting
to DELIGHT in it

16 girls showed up. 16 wonderful, beautiful, seeking girls. We had a blast! We played games, ate WAY to much, and laughed until we cried because Mad Gab and Apples to Apples are the most hilarious games EVER when you are happy and delirious! I mean... this is hilarious: one of the girls had the word "DRAMATIC" and the options to choose from were "Amputations, End of the World, (others I forgot), and BEANIE BABIES!"  Obviously... the end of the world is the most dramatic thing possible. Did she pick that? NO! She sat, thinking for a while, and then picked... (drum roll) BEANIE BABIES!!! We were laughing hysterically, and she said "duh.. I don't want to watch a movie about the end of the world... I want to watch movies about BEANIE BABIES!" bahaha. 

Joy in offering.

Then one of the girls says "I'm ready to worship Jesus now." YES! My heart just danced around inside. She set it up, picked the songs off iTunes we would be singing, and we worshipped! It was overwhelmingly great. No loud speakers, no words on a screen, no lights or guitar player... just us and Jesus. That's good stuff..


Then 2 of the other girls were ready to lead the devo... and I was ready to listen and learn.  It was beautiful. It was from their hearts and what God has been teaching them. It was so awesome to see them digging into the Word, becoming self-seekers (not just depending on a preacher to give it to them), and challenging and pressing into the hard questions. I really can't explain to you... my heart is just giddy thinking about it. They offered their talents, their teaching, their fears, their struggles, and their seeking hearts. Out of everything, these girls talked about 1 Chronicles 28:9-10:
⁹ “And Solomon, my son, learn to know the God of your ancestors intimately. Worship and serve him with your whole heart and a willing mind. For the LORD sees every heart and knows every plan and thought. If you seek him, you will find him. But if you forsake him, he will reject you forever. ¹⁰ So take this seriously. The LORD has chosen you to build a Temple as his sanctuary. Be strong, and do the work.”
They dug into what it means to follow God WHOLE-heartedly. To know His Word. To SEEK Him. What it means to be chosen and how to obey. They dove into what it means to be disciplined and delighted to study His Word!! Ohh...  It was really beautiful. We all listened, engaged, and learned. 

Learning and loving hearts. 

Afterwards, we started talking about the CHANGE we want to see in our church, our town, our lives. I see God working in their lives in the most amazing, even tangible, ways. They came up with the idea to sing, as a worship choir, in one of our Sunday morning services!!! This is a HUGE deal! These girls haven't ever been on the stage on a Sunday morning, let alone sang in front of the congregation.  They are willing to feel crazy, step out of the norm, be bold, and follow God's guiding in obedience!!! I am so excited for our church to SEE what God is doing in their lives.  I see it every week... but the other church members have NO idea how awesome and real and crazy awesome Jesus is being in these girls' lives! They want the opportunity to show them - not raise their hands in worship just so people will look at them... but to sing, to praise for HIS glory! Now... the idea blew up and God has taken off with it! Not only will they be doing one song... but the entire youth will be singing as a worship choir, youth will be doing the instruments for that Sunday's worship, Jacob will be involved. I am THRILLED!!! I cannot wait!!! Sunday... February 26th... I am claiming as a day of REVIVAL! A day of AWAKENING! A day of PRAISE! Please claim it with me. My heart, church, and town so desperately need it! I know God is faithful and He will be ever-present and blessed in the obedience of his followers - these bold and brave youth! :)  


I SEE God moving all around. I really do. I am aware of His movements, His nudges, and am so excited for what He has in store. He is faithful. He is a God who transforms hearts, who RAISES UP sinners and dead corpses! I'm all in! Please pray with me for February 26th. PRAY PRAY PRAY! And be excited with me and our youth!!! Our God is big! 


So that's what's happening in my neck of the woods! :) 

vomit on a page...

hola! Once again I haven't blogged in a while, because I feel that if I blog when so much stuff is going on in my head it will just be vomit on a page.  I guess I will just start vomiting away because... well, you might like it. 


I've been learning a lot lately. I think I'm learning a lot because I'm learning to LISTEN. Not only to God, but to my husband, to others, and myself.  I constantly tell the girls they are CHOSEN, HOLY, CALLED, ANOINTED... but SO often I don't see that for myself. I think I am too much... or too little. I can't see the magnitude of which God is transforming me, renewing me, and anointing me for his work. 


I am having some craziness go on in my life... some that I didn't expect and didn't ask for. There are opportunities for me to do things that I did not set out to do... that weren't in MY plans.  This craziness wasn't in my plans because I didn't think I was worthy.  My mind screams that I am ONLY 24, my credentials are LIMITED, my knowledge is LITTLE, my experience is MINIMAL, and WHO AM I??? My insecurities are overwhelming. Really... they are. But, when I choose to listen, God SCREAMS LOUDER "YOU ARE MINE! YOU ARE ENOUGH BECAUSE I AM ENOUGH. YOU ARE ABLE BECAUSE MY POWER IS IN YOU. YOU CAN DO IT BECAUSE YOU WILL DEPEND ON ME!" My heart accepts that. It longs to always believe it. I keep hearing Him ask me "IF NOT YOU... WHO?" He has raised me up. He loves me. 

I am ALWAYS appreciative and in need of prayers. The other day, when lots was happening, I sent a text out to my besties just asking for prayer. I didn't say any specifics (like now)... just asked for prayers. My maid of honor, Em, texted me back that she was praying Isaiah 55 over me. So... I hurried to BibleGateway.com to see what that passage was and... the tears came. My Jesus (and em) know me so well.  Look -

³ “Come to me with your ears wide open.
      Listen, and you will find life.
   I will make an everlasting covenant with you.
      I will give you all the unfailing love I promised to David.
 ⁴ See how I used him to display my power among the peoples.
      I made him a leader among the nations.
 ⁵ You also will command nations you do not know,
      and peoples unknown to you will come running to obey,
   because I, the LORD your God,
      the Holy One of Israel, have made you glorious.”

 ⁶ Seek the LORD while you can find him.
      Call on him now while he is near.
 ⁷ Let the wicked change their ways
      and banish the very thought of doing wrong.
   Let them turn to the LORD that he may have mercy on them.
      Yes, turn to our God, for he will forgive generously.

 ⁸ “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the LORD.
      “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
 ⁹ For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
      so my ways are higher than your ways
      and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.

Oh... my heart. It's exactly what I want prayed over me... that HIS PLANS would happen... not my measly little ones. I don't want them. I want my true heart's desire and only He knows it! I want to abandon my insecurities and rest in His promises. They are much better. I am chosen. He will use me. I surrender.


That's what I'm learning... you should too. No, you can't do whatever He's calling you to do. If you could do it, what would be the point in prayer? in trust? in faith? in surrender? YOU NEED HIM!!!! JUMP... He's got this!!! 
See... I told you... VOMIT!!! Yum! 

Onto another subject.  I was given an AWARD!!! :) The Liebster Blog award. It's a big deal... and you know it! :) It was from another bestie, Lindsey Jo. 

Liebster in German means dearest, beloved, or favorite, 

and it is for bloggers with under 200 followers!

The Liebster award is a little game where you give the "award" (I'm waiting on my trophy) to the fav 5 blogs with less than 200 followers!! Then... if you get the award (like me) you have to give it to back out!!! I know you are excited to see who won!! READY? 

Here are my winners:

• Kelly Vaughan, my role model. I'm telling you people... without this lady investing in me, loving me, and believing in me while I was in Knoxville, my life with Jesus would look a lot different. She taught me about freedom, teaching, loving, and leading. Her blog is unbelievable. It should be a book. I will be a learner of Kelly Vaughan as long as I'm here. 
• BACK AT YA Lindsey Jo!! She really is hilarious - online and real life. She's not like the Brad Paisley song "So much better online"... she's really just great. I love her! Go read her blobs and see her little babe Isaac Henry (she's OBSESSED... and I like it)
• My bestie Emily!! When she does blog, it's hilarious, wonderful, and just so lovely. Maybe if you go over there and show her some love she will be more consistent... but maybe not.  I love her dearly and you will too! 
• My youth minister's wife growing up, Michele! She is in China RIGHT NOW getting their daughter, MJ!!! She's precious!! Go see!! Michele is a wonderful, passionate, lady of Jesus!!! She was not a cookie-cutter Baptist church youth minister's wife and I am SO THANKFUL FOR IT!!! Yay for FREEDOM! 
• Our bro and sis, Ashley and Jared!! Without them... I don't know what me and Jacob would be doing. They have been such an awesome example of a marriage running hard after Jesus!!!! Ashley writes a lot about Johanna! she's presh!!!!!! i love her!

CONGRATS!! Now... pick your favs! :) It's fun!